Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Planning wall

In doing my assignment this week one of the hang-ups has been defining my dream/goal. I am one of those people that is back at square one. After my interviews last week it became clear that I needed to revisit my dream/goal because it was shifting and melting toghether a couple of the things I feel most passionate about.

I want to enlighten/motivate/empower girls/young women to reach their highest potential.

This journey of mapping it out was tougher than I thought it was going to be. I hope meeting with my success team on Wednesday will help refine my goal and jogg ideas that can help me reach my goal. I really like my success teams so far:). My T.A. last week really helped me bring my goal down to the first steps and she was very encouraging. I felt like she helped me to focus on this path of planning and plotting that I would be on for the rest of the week.

The weekly goal plan was good and my team was great in brainstorming ideas last week. More info in the last entry.

The flow chart was a bit difficult because I know what I want to do but translating that into a fine-tuned, short, all encompassing sentence was difficult. Breaking it down into first steps was also hard and it just goes back to tunnel vision. I think I do not see/do not want to see options out there and subconsciously I struggle with this assignment.

The photo part of it I love. Finding people that will/would be supportive-FUN!!

The yearly goals are great to just step outside the box and dream. I never did a five year plan before but I realized the importance in not only setting short term goals but also long term goals. It was not as scary as I thought it was going to be and I really enjoyed doing it and and cannot wait until I reach some of them.

The calendar goal was a bit of a struggle too. Honestly, I did not allow myself to be free and just put down whatever came into my head. Most thoughts made me think of a question I had asked Karen Oterro (past entry-step 3). Do you feel restricted or cautious when you write? I felt very hesitant and filtered when I wrote my monthly goals. I kept asking myself is this too much? too little? realistic?
One of the big things that keep creeping is in the question of what about the rest of my life? How much of an impact will all this exploration have on my family, friends and acquaintances? If I change this part of me who will I lose? what will I sacrifice? what will I gain?

Looking at my wall now I feel content with what I have. It is not perfect or as colorful as I had hoped but it is mine and I love it. I have taken that first step to a better life. I went kicking and screaming but here I am and for that, I am grateful to the Universe.

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